Let's Knit Together

The UK's Friendliest Online Knitting Club

Let's Knit Together is a thriving community full of people ready to share advice and chat all things knitting. Access 2,500+ quality-checked patterns, a library of handy how-to videos and much more.

Join Now Join for just £1
cancel

Message Icon Would you like to get crafting essentials straight to your inbox? Yes please

20 Knit & Crochet Jokes You Can’t Unhear

20 Knit & Crochet Jokes You Can’t Unhear

If you’ve never heard a knitting or crochet joke before, you’re in for a treat! Here are 20 jokes that will have you crying, laughing, and then crying again. Beware, you might not be able to unhear them…

What happened to the cat who ate a ball of yarn?

She had mittens.

What do you call an unmarried stitch?

A single crochet.

Why do spiders spin webs?

No one’s ever taught them to crochet.

20 Knit & Crochet Jokes You Can’t Unhear
What happened to the naughty granny square?

He got into treble.

At first I wasn't sure about crocheting toys...

...But it ami-grew-on-me.

What did one yarn end say to the other?

“No, I’m a frayed knot”

What kind of needlework is always angry?

Cross stitch.

What did the knitter say to Michael Buble?

I’ve got you under my skein.

20 Knit & Crochet Jokes You Can’t Unhear
How many sheep does it take to make a blanket?

None - sheep can’t crochet.

What did the hat say to the blanket?

“You stay here, I’ll go on a head”

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a porcupine?

An animal that knits its own sweaters.

20 Knit & Crochet Jokes You Can’t Unhear
Why could a knitter never be Prime Minister?

Because she would keep too much yarn in her cabinet.

Who raided Peter Pan's yarn stash?

Captain Hook!

What are the steps of learning to crochet?

It’s a chain of events.

What do you get if you put a sheep on a trampoline?

A woolly jumper.

Why are Christmas trees so bad at knitting?

They always drop their needles.

20 Knit & Crochet Jokes You Can’t Unhear
How do knitters travel?

By cable car.

How do knitters get more fibre in their diet?

They go to their local yarn shop.

What did the pirate say when he stood on a needle?

Oh, daaarn!

What X-Men character liked to knit?

Wool-verine.

20 Knit & Crochet Jokes You Can’t Unhear
Newsletter Image

Get the latest blogs from us sent straight to your inbox!

Almost there! Please check your emails to confirm your subscription

Enjoy this blog? Then don't miss these...

See all

Don't miss these awesome free crochet patterns

See all
Instagram
@KnitCrochet

Join our other 2,250+ followers

Meet our crafts family